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A friend texted me around 1 p.m. today. She used more than 160 characters but as soon as I saw the “Avonte,” I knew what she had to tell me.

Both of us have children on the autism spectrum.  I wanted desperately since October to be proven wrong, because I was a realist on the outside and a secret idealist.

I told her that I was in shock but not shocked by the news.  The local stations had reported the possibility since last week.

I cannot think.  I feel and it is too great for me to share.  That’s why I told my friend that I felt a pain, a reverberating pain, as if once I read the words the parents of Avonte reached out to the whole world with that pain. 

I’m not ready to think yet.  We are all feeling this shared pain tonight. 

I don’t think I will sleep well tonight.